The difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships is that people in the healthy never question themselves or the environment they're in.
Of course this can happen in unhealthy relationships too when the parties have normalised all there is and are unable to exit something that doesn't serve them...
Most likely because they are unable to identify it as unhealthy.
And here I am; questioning whether floating in a sea of uncertain interactions with people who are uncertain of themselves is the best choice I can make for myself.
Sarah tells me to face my issues of trust and relationship and to ignore people who interfere with it and the things that bother me. But that in itself is a paradox. It is encouraging a standpoint that takes all the active effort I have left in me. It's like asking a woman to stand among misogynists and not be hated. Like asking an overweight to stand among bullies and not hear their nasty comments.
And although this is feasible, because impossible is nothing, imagine how much strength and willingness that takes. I'm not saying I haven't got it; I'm just saying I don't need to be in a position where I constantly have to use it.
Besides, what would my therapist say?
She's my only real long-term point of healthy reference.
Just because others will thing I'm stronger than I am while she knows I'm not; and because it's her job to make things clear and sound to an unhealthy mind.
And though therapy ended months ago, the real therapy is to face struggles when they appear- and
to eventually not get close to them at all,
and not to be doubtful about personal decisions that may be in conflict with other,
perhaps equally troubled personalities as yours before you took the healthy choice.
With all due respect.
